Every comment on my last post touched my soul. Thank you for sharing. I’ll be writing back to every one of you today, but for now let’s kick off our first day on the road to happy.
Do you ever feel like this? A month ago, panic attacks set in by 9 am. I had a very specific fear and I let it consume my life. I was trapped in a prison made from my own mind. And quite honestly, it didn’t really matter. Let me explain why. You see, five years ago I got out a notebook and wrote down a list of goals & dreams. Last December, we accomplished the last of them, right at 4-3/4 years. Amazing. A huge blessing. But since then, I have been a ship without a rudder. And it’s really hard to make good long term goals when you are afraid of tomorrow. And without good goals, you simply can’t see a path out of the forest of fear.
In the sinister forest, when Alice fears she is losing her mind, she stumbles upon the Cheshire Cat. Two roads branch before her and she asks him which road she should take. I’ve committed his answer to memory.
Anxiety has so many forms. Mine affected me so physically that more than once I thought I was dying. It was not hard to choose the other path. But how to take the first step baffled me! But here is how I did it (and your homework for today!) Spend at least 30 minutes. Enjoy the feel of pen to paper. Invest this time in yourself. You are valuable, and you are worth 30 minutes. If you can, take more time and really ponder these questions.
Day 1 Challenge – #31daystohappy
Get a notebook. During this process, I’ve used three notebooks and they were money well spent. Never mind that I really just love schools supplies. After you have your notebook and a pen, I want you to answer the following questions in it:
What is going right in my life? How do I feel about these things?
What makes me happy consistently? What and who make you bone deep happy?
What things in life am I looking forward to? What gets me excited when I think about it?
What commitments do I have? Why are you committed to them? Are they things that you enjoy?
So take a break, fill those out, and come back for your final (but most important!) question.
Now that you are thinking of the happy things in your life, thinking of what makes you excited, let’s make a goal.
What do you want? Who do you want to be in 31 days? How does that fit in with who I want to be in one year? in five?
These are harder than you think. The only rule here is your statement has to start with ‘I Want…’ and it can’t be the opposite of wanting. For instance, you can’t say ‘i want out of this toxic relationship’ or ‘i don’t want to work at xyz company anymore’. Don’t write ‘I don’t want to feel this anxiety’. That is the opposite of wanting. Those are things you DON’T want. Take a minute. What do you want? When I did this exercise, the top of my list was ‘I WANT TO BE HAPPY’. In all caps. You answer this question for yourself, but make sure it is the bone deep want that your soul can’t live without.
Don’t stop there. I want ten things. Your list doesn’t have to be limited to one thing. Dream big. I have ten wants – write a best selling novel! to have glowing skin! to radiate positivity! Whatever you want, write it down. There is power in the written word that is far beyond just keeping a thought in your head. If possible, read these things out loud. In Eastern medicine, energy often gets caught in the throat chakra. In Christian traditions, we pray out loud for things we are asking of our Heavenly Father. There is power in speaking your truth.
If you are participating on IG (and I hope you will! I am dreaming of a community where we support each other this month and share our audacious dreams) post one of your wants. What picture represents that? You can snap a picture of your notebook, with or without with your writing. Maybe snap of picture of what makes you happy.
Feel free to share in the comments if you choose. These are sensitive subjects & I ask that everyone be treated with love and respect.
I am not a doctor and nothing I write here is a substitute for medical advice. If you are suffering from a medical condition, please seek help immediately. For my full disclaimer, please click here
Thanks for sharing! I love the quote and I believe it applies in all life situations- happy or not! Unfortunately we often forget! I need to sit down and think about my goals and what I want! Thanks for reminding me to do so!
This is such a wonderful opportunity to dive into the depths of our souls and ask ourselves essential and meaningful questions. Thank you Amanda! From the bottom of my heart!
This is exactly what I need right now! I have battled with panic attacks for 16 years. Lately they are really bad, I sent my oldest off to college and am struggling with some very specific fears that are consuming my thoughts and keeping me from enjoying the rest of life. Thank you for being honest with your struggles and organizing this!
Great exercise!
My co-worker had shared the #31daystohappy! I wish I would’ve brought my notebook today to answer the questions above. Going thru our wedding process, has very much distracted me from happiness, when you would think it should be the happiest time of our live! Being a little over 31 days, to the big day, I am excited to start and follow this to see if this so called “funk” I am may seem to blossom into something more beautiful! Thank you for creating something so great <3
I think I need this exercise more than I realize because I am finding it extremely difficult to answer the questions. I better get myself a notebook. Thank you for you for your bravery and for leading this. It is needed.
Happy? Notebook, pens and 30 minutes to myself? I’m in!!!!
Thank you for hosting this.
I love this, Amanda! It’s always best to stay in the positive and that’s what you are asking us to do. It’s so much more productive and meaningful. Thank you for sharing your struggle. I think often of our meeting at Quilt Market in SLC. You are such a lovely person!
Fantastic idea. I’ve always said to my kids. It’s not the amount of crap you have to deal with but how to look at it with a positive mindset. Sometime however it does seem overwhelming.
lm opening a notebook I purchased ages ago. I’ll be on IG.
Thank you, Jillian! Mindset really is so important! I appreciate you joining us! – Amanda
Well… I tried. My first page was a disaster. It was a bad day and I knew it wouldn’t go well. I’m trying again today as the cloud that hung on me Thursday has lifted somewhat so I’m hoping it won’t make everything so grey and dark.
I get that. Getting in the right mindset can be really hard. I have pages that aren’t super uplifting. But remember, if you are joining this, I’m guessing you want to be happy. Imagine yourself when you are happy. What do you see? Once you can get that vision in your head, you can achieve it. When my days were like that, I listened to a guided meditation nearly the entire day. I used the insight timer app. I listened during free time, I listened as I fell asleep at night. I also found listening to ‘the power of positive thinking’ via audible to be an incredible experience. If you’d like specific meditations i found helpful, send me an email at amanda@acraftyfox.net. hugs to you!!! Amanda
Thank you . This is what I need to do as I am full of fear and anxiety .
I’m coming to this a few days late via IG. I have just spent 40mins answering the questions, wow, were they hard! I had no idea I didn’t know what I wanted – only what I don’t want. I get so wrapped up in the negative downward spiral, I’m really hoping that having some kind of positive goal will help to break this cycle. Thank you so much for this xx
I’m here to leave a couple of ((hugs)). I don’t have any sage advice, I wish I did. I think there are many people in this world who are suffering as you are.
I’m not going to talk about myself because this is all about you! Just want to say “you are enough” please remember that.
Thanks for this, Amanda! Perfect timing for me. I retired a year ago, and am enjoying life, but I’m just doing things, and not really doing the most important things. The Lewis Carroll quote is perfect for me at this time in my life. So, thanks for offering this online “mentoring”, providing accountability to stay focused on goals and prioritizing my time and energy so I not only enjoy my days, but am getting to where I want to be in my life! This is really wonderful. I just completed your Day 1 Challenge, and will catch up with you this week! Blessings to you and all who are trying this!
Oh boy this was hard! I can’t answer all of the questions as I am literally looking forward to nothing. The one thing my soul desires is a baby, and that is something I can never have. It doesn’t leave much to look forward to! Thank you for sharing your examples of things you want out of this because it gave me some ideas (which is a large step up from the blank I was drawing) haha.
Sorry for not participating on IG, it’s hard to get personal using a “business” account, and taking the first step (clicking the link) took 18 days lol. I’m not usually a commentor either, but just feel the need to say THANK YOU for giving me the slightest idea that hope may exist.
I want a meaningful, mutually satisfying relationship with my husband.
I want to earn trust.
I want adult conversation.
I want to feel passion.
I want emotional health for myself and everyone in my family.
I want to mutually crave each other and look forward to our time together.
I want to give and receive kisses all the time when we are together.
I want to give and receive warm hellos and goodbyes.
I want to be adored and be adoring and doting.
I want to give a great example to the kids of what a healthy adult relationship is.
I want to follow the logic in a discussion and participate in the conversation in an uplifting way. I want to communicate better with listening and verbal language.
I want to invite the spirit to be in our home.
I want to demonstrate to the kids how to function.
I want to go after goals and projects with gusto and daring.
I want to be full of fun surprises.
I want to regularly and routinely use habits and organization, predictably put myself and my home together.
I want to prepare myself in advance for every day and thing that comes my way.
I want to take pride in what I do and inspire my family to be proud of me.
I want to nurture my marriage and stay married. I want to make it.
I want to support my husband and family the ways they uniquely need.
I want to know and believe and live proving that I am enough.
I want to live as an example of the believers.
I want to love with such a power that has an effect on how people feel and act.
I want to follow my faith, not my fears.
I want to use my time on earth well, being productive and efficient with each moment God gifts to me.
I want to run and not be weary, being engaged in a good cause with wisdom to pace myself according to my strength.
If I have a need, I want to communicate that need in an inspiring way.
I want my shortcomings to become endearing and later strengths.
I want to be embraced as who I am and feel worth it by first embracing myself and others as who they are.
I want to make memories and remember my life with smiles.
Buying a notebook today! Wow this is very thought provoking! Thank you!